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Dating blog Blog
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Thu, 28 Aug 2008
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A Successful Way to Attract and Pick-Up Women One of the dominant thing in an interaction with a
woman is sexual tension.
Sexual tension is the energy or charge of an
interaction. Its application is subtle but powerful
and effective.
There are many different concepts of sexual tension
floating around in the seduction community.
Some of these techniques are better than others,
and can definitely improve the quality and success
of your pickups. I prefer a very pure definition of
sexual tension because it is grounded in real
sexual desire, and a very natural way of magnifying
the tension felt by the woman.
Some examples of these are cocky bantering and
flirting, explicit sexual interest paired with
false barriers, using the word “sexy”, “you hot” to
convey a sexual intent, and of course the old Speed
Seduction route – complex language patterns
intended to implant sexual thoughts in a woman’s mind.
Controlled Sexual Arousal State
Sexual tension is the presence of a controlled
arousal state, in the absence of overt sexual interest.
In a right time, I create sexual tension by
focusing my sexual desire on my woman, but not
doing any overt sexual advances. I maintain a sense
of ambiguity, which keeps her focused on me,
directing her mind toward sexual imagination. My
state is transferred to her, and she is now
aroused. It is then only a matter of handling
logistics through leadership and compliance techniques.
How to have a controlled arousal state
It’s not as simple as just being turned on,
although that’s part of it. State control is vital
- if you are nervous or uncomfortable, you won’t be
able to get sexually aroused. (State control is not
only vital in seduction, but in life. It allows you
to stay calm, generally happy, and more productive.
In spiritual terms, it is sometimes called “staying
centered” or having “peace of mind.”)
The best way to stay calm and comfortable in social
situations is experience. Socialize more, go out
(sober), get experience talking to women.
Meditation, good diet, avoidance of harmful
indulgences like drug use, television, internet,
and regular exercise all help.
Creating Tension
For the “getting turned on” part, raising your
testosterone level will have an incredible effect.
Natural ways to increase testosterone include heavy
weight training (squats, deadlifts, bench press,
etc.) zinc supplementation, eating lots of animal
protein, and if possible, regular sex.
You already know how to get aroused. During your
interactions with women, simply focus on what she’d
look like naked, or imagine having sex with her, or
whatever fun little thoughts you want to entertain.
There are two reasons why a sexually aroused state
is so important. First, women love sex. A sexual
man is valuable to a woman because he can give her
pleasure. Women are attracted to men who are
attracted to women.
The second reason is more subtle. There is a
phenomenon I call “state-transfer.” Have you ever
been in a bad mood, and a friend came by in a
really great, excited mood?
Your mood probably changed, and you found yourself
smiling and cheering up in spite of yourself.
How do you feel around someone when they are nervous?
You feel nervous too! Think of a time you were with
a woman, say a girlfriend, and she was obviously
very horny and sexually aroused, but you weren’t
doing anything sexual. You probably got excited
because she was excited. This is how humans
hypnotize each other in every day life – we
transfer our states to each other.
State transfer may occur on a metaphysical, psychic
energy level. But more so, a state is transferred
with non-verbal sub communication. When you are
turned on, your voice subtly (or not so subtly)
reflects your state, as do your facial expressions,
eye contact, manner of touching, body language, and
a million other little things to numerous to try to
micromanage.
The tension component is really an extension of the
second level of the Attraction Hierarchy -
Intrigue. Intrigue can be described in two ways. It
can be seen as a lack of over-validating a woman,
or getting her attention fixated on you by being
ambiguous and holding back information.
These are flip sides of the same coin. Applied to
sexual tension, we enter a sexual state, but don’t
verbalize our desire.
If we did, she may like it, or not like it, but at
now she knows where she stands - she is validated.
That isn’t bad, but it’s not optimal. She has you
figured out, and knows you want her, which gives
her the option of forgetting about you and focusing
elsewhere. You are “solved.”
Another key point about verbalizing sexual interest
is that it puts her in a position where she has to
agree to it. She must consciously admit that this
is leading to sex. Again, that’s not bad, but is
not optimal, and sometimes can create a mental
block in her mind for getting isolated with you.
Imagine sitting in a room with a closed treasure
chest in front of you. Then you open it and find
gold coins. When is the chest more interesting?
True, the gold coins are great, but there’s no
longer a mystery. You can even forget about the
gold coins for a while to go watch TV or call a
friend, because those coins aren’t going anywhere.
But before you know what’s in there, that chest
preoccupies your mind and keeps your attention.
Once you have mastered that concept, you're well on
your way.
Vin DiCarlo
Posted 03:18
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